Advice and Answers Ask Leeor

Ask Leeor: Why Can’t I Manifest a Relationship?

July 5, 2017
relationship advice
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Love & Relationships – Ask Leeor Question and Answer

  • D has his life together and seems to have a great grasp of the Law of Attraction, but is having problems manifesting a relationship.
  • At 29, he isn’t interested in settling down yet, but also doesn’t want a one night stand.
  • Though he’s not looking for a soulmate, he’s been trying to manifest some fun, light relationships – and has not been successful.
  • D’s situation requires ego work and working through resistances.

(Certain Ask Leeor questions & answers will be posted as individual blog posts.) 

“Dear Leeor,

I saw your videos on Youtube and was really impressed (and grateful to have found you on media).

I have been having trouble for some time manifesting any sort of relationship/interaction with women. Contrary to many men, I am not seeking to get married right away (I’m only 29), and conversely am not looking for one-night stands.

I am very respectful of women, and doubt my inability to attract stems from ‘bad karma.’ Rather, as my mother, who is very spiritual, contends, the universe is blocking me from finding a significant other until after I finish at UCLA.

I can appreciate the logic there, but am frustrated with God/the Universe, because I think the heavens sometimes, “how can I know if being in a relationship, even a relatively light one, will distract me from my school work or overwhelm me if I do not even have an experience with which to judge?”

I have not dated since high school, and that is no one’s fault, I just had too much going on in life. But things have settled for at least a few years now and I still have been unable to manifest any sort of romantic relationship with a woman, and it is frustrating.

Sorry for the longwinded email. Hopefully you have some suggestions.

Thanks and best.

-D”





Reply:

Dear D,

Thank you so much for reaching out to me. Your situation is actually quite common. You have some sort of block, a wall that stands in between you and the possibility of meeting someone and starting even a light relationship.

From your e-mail, what I can immediately pinpoint is you are telling yourself a few stories that have likely become belief systems for you. Believe it, and the universe will make it so.

It’s likely that the story began after high school. You started believing you didn’t have the time for someone else. That pattern may have gone on for a couple of years, until you found yourself thinking – “Wow, I haven’t really dated since high school.” Then, you began telling yourself other stories to rationalize the situation you found yourself in, which became your new belief systems.

I believe that your belief system now is based on your mother’s explanation of why you aren’t dating. Though she is likely an extremely intelligent woman who wants only the best for you, her explanation may be doing you more harm than good. If you started to believe that the universe does not want you dating until you finish at UCLA, then the universe will make it so.

The question you ask yourself (“how can I know if being in a relationship, even a relatively light one, will distract me from my school work or overwhelm me if I do not even have an experience with which to judge?”) focuses on lacking what it is that you want. If you are preoccupied with this question, you will only create more lack of that experience.

My suggestion is to first do some ego work and learn that you are not your story. You are a brand new person every single morning. You do NOT have to carry around your 29 years of life every single day. Carrying around our story makes us behave in certain ways, which often set us back.

I would then work on the blockage you have that keeps you from manifesting what it is that you want. I have both a video and a blog post to help you with that – working through any resistance to manifesting. Check those out and let me know how things go for you; it’s only up from here. Proud of your hard work!

Best,

Leeor




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